Jeff,

If I would have known that it was my last chance to talk to you, here’s what I would have said.

I would have told you that I didn’t stop loving you, even though I had to distance myself from your addiction and your choices.

I would have told you that I wanted my brother back.  The brother I used to know, the one that I tried to protect his whole life.  The brother that used to be so much fun to be with and to laugh with.

I would have told you that your two kids, your parents, your sisters, your brother and all your nieces and nephews still had faith that one day you would get into recovery and that you would be a part of our lives again.

I would have told you that if you were to die, that you would take a piece of me with you. 

I would have told you that I will always love you and that I will miss you every minute of every day until I’m with you again.

My heart aches for one more hour with you and one more chance to hug you and tell you I love you.

Your sister,

Lisa, age 47