Dear You,

I never thought I’d see the day where I’d be able to walk away from you. We spent four years together, lived together and would have gotten married. I had my whole life planned out in front of me. But I am so much happier now than I’ve ever been in my whole life, and it’s ironic that it’s without you — without the one person I thought I was destined to be with.

I’m so mad at myself for sticking around thinking things would get better. For wasting my time. I should have known that people don’t change. As the years went on I had to beg you to simply look at me while you were talking, I had to beg to get a conversation that was meaningful. Beg for hugs, or kisses as you rolled your eyes, or looked away. I was told how many days a week I was allowed out of the house. I had a curfew; something my own parents never gave me. Even though all of this, I still cooked, cleaned, drove you to and from work everyday even when I didn’t have to be up for hours because you never owned a car or had a license. I bought you anything and everything. I took care of you like a wife would. I let you go out with whoever you wanted, as late as you wanted, with no question. I came home from work six days a week at 2 am and did dishes that overflowed out of the sink and took out garbage that fell onto the floor.

Finally one day it hit me, that I could not live like that anymore. I couldn’t stand being unappreciated. No matter how long I invested my time in our relationship. I went out one night. I got drunk. I slept with someone else. And while some people think it’s a deceitful thing to do, I’m so thankful I did. It gave me the push I needed to leave you, because I felt so guilty and I couldn’t come clean about what I did. If I didn’t do that, I would’ve stayed with you thinking things would get better, or give you your 59th “chance.” I would have been married to someone who didn’t appreciate me at all, who saw me as their personal maid and taxi.

Thank you for treating me like dirt. It’s made me stronger and I finally found someone who treats me like gold and it feels ten times better because it’s not what I’m used to at all. I smile a lot more now and I enjoy being kissed passionately without having to ask for it. I never new life could feel this good. Thank you.

Me, age 22