Dear unborn child,

I am sorry that it has taken me eleven years to write this. I am sorry that had I done the right thing, you would be a beautiful 10 year old little boy or girl.

When I found out you were inside me, I was scared. So, so scared. But immediately, I loved you. Mum and the rest of the family, including who would’ve been your father, didn’t quite feel the same. Each and everyone of them telling me that you were wrong. A dreadful mistake. A burden.

But I knew what I felt. I knew that you were my child and that you already meant the absolute world to me. I haven’t been to your grave in a long time. It still hurts to know what I did. What I must wake up being guilty of every single day.

Doesn’t mean much now, but I adore you. Given the chance, I would be stronger. I would stand up and say, “No! This child is mine, and I will love and keep it.”

Forgive me.

Mum, age 25