Dad,

Everyone says I support Mom more than I support you. It makes me angry because I try so hard not to choose sides, and the truth is that you both pull me in different directions until I think I’ll break from the tension. I hate you both for the way you’ve made me—emotional, distrustful, perpetually guilty. I hate you both for making demands of me that I could never possibly meet, for making me feel like I had to be the mediator in your abusive marriage, for making me feel like this was all somehow my fault, for making me feel like I was nothing but a regret in your horrible relationship.

But the fact of the matter is that you never pulled me in your direction like Mom did. You never asked me to carry derogatory messages to her. You rarely brought her up in an awful way in front of me. You never expected me to choose a side. And I thank you for that. If I do support you more than Mom, those are the reasons why. Which is why I am so sorry for yelling at you today when she was the one who deserved my anger.

I will never get over the fact that you—and Mom—made my life a living hell, and still do. But I appreciate your attempts to leave me out of your miserable marriage wherever you can. I hope we can have a better relationship someday, when I don’t have to constantly be in the middle of this.

Love,

Your daughter, 22