Dear Dad,

Why did you not want to be my Dad? Why didn’t you let my sister and I into your life. You have the most amazing daughters and grandchildren now. You really are missing out.

I used to think that it was my fault. Having twins at such a young age, you probably just wanted to go out and have fun. Mum has never said a bad word about you. Yes, I was a child when all of this happened, but I realised for myself that you did not want to be my Dad.

When I was little I would wait for you to come home from work; as a child waiting for something can seem like hours. When you came home, you came in and went upstairs to bed. I used to hear you take your boots off and throw them on the floor. I heard it so often that I knew the sound would mean that you were not coming downstairs, not even to say hello. I’m 39 now and still hate the sound of shoes being taken off and thrown on the floor.

For a few years after you and mum split up, you did not want to see my sister and I. Why? Were you angry at Mum?

After a while you wanted to see us again. We would see you after school, once a week. You would pick us up from school and drive us to McDonalds for tea. You would take us to your flat, rent a video, give us sweets and leave us in front of the TV all evening. You would be elsewhere, making phone calls. We did this for a long time.

After a while you got a house and we would stay with you for the odd weekend. When my sister and I would wake up, we would go downstairs and watch TV as you did not get up until late. Where was my Dad? Yes, you took us away on holidays and even brought us a bike each. But who was my Dad? Where was my Dad?

As we grew older, you had a new family. My sister and I were pushed even further down the list. Of course you should give your family your time, effort, love and commitment. This was hard for my sister and I to watch; we had waited for so long for some love, affection and effort. The reasons why you and Mum broke up were not the fault of my sister and I, so why were we punished for that?

It’s been about 10 years or more since we last spoke. Please be our Dad. The saddest thing is that you know where we both live. You can make the effort, if you want to.

Your daughters, age 39