Dear Dad,

It’s only recently that I realized that I am ready to finally give up on you. After 19 years, I wonder if you’ll ever get it together. I’ve watched every day as you slowly kill yourself with constant work, drinking, and smoking. Mom always tried to get you to take better care of yourself, but instead every day you drink more and smoke more and push us away and it hurts her everyday. 

After you’re third DUI and you went to jail for the whole summer and mom bought me that dog I thought things would have changed. They did when you quit drinking for a while, but not for the better. You just got angrier and angrier and pushed us away even more.

I’m sorry that my brother and sister only wanted things from you like money and stuff instead of wanting to spend time with you. I’m sorry that because of them, spending time with me was a chore. You used to buy me things and I liked that, but when I got older and needed someone to help me figure things out and teach me how to be a man, you weren’t there. You were always working or passed out so I had to learn on my own and figure out who I am.

I’m sorry that none of us can rely on you when all we want is the best for you.

I’m sorry that I wasn’t enough. When you told me you were moving out I was so mad at mom for a long time. I’m sorry for being mad at her for trying to keep our family together. I’m sorry I’ve given up on you, but you had nineteen years to try and take an interest in my life and you haven’t. I will always be here if you ever decide to change, I sincerely hope you do. You can only disappoint someone for so long, though. I will always be here for you, dad.

Sincerely,
Tired of disappointment, age 19