To those with a disability,

I regret the day I did not speak up when I saw him ridicule people with disabilities. It is a day I struggle with often in my conscious. I have grown up knowing, caring for, and loving people with disabilities but my voice remained silent as he continued his act of ignorance. I chose not to act out of fear, fear of being singled out and ridiculed myself, rather than acting out of love.

It was someone stronger than me, a surprising someone, who spoke up as ally for those that were not even present. A confrontation I was too scared to make but relieved to witness. And yet, I am left with embarrassment. and shame Not speaking up is like being a part of it, as if I condoned his hurtful behavior or, even worse, chose to ridicule others myself. I think of the kids I watched my mother teach and tutor, these wonderful human beings who deserved more than silence from me that day. The kids whose unique qualities and strengths humble me as I think of how they shined through their struggles and triumphs. What they deserved was someone who was willing to be different, to speak up and open up to being vulnerable so that strength could stream out. They deserved an ally, not a coward.

I wish I could go back and be that ally. I am sorry I was not.

Working to be an ally, age 32